Whole

"The moments when I truly live are the moments when I act with my whole will." 

-Oswald Chambers

For some reason, this statement hit deep.  There are a few choice moments in life when I could say I felt truly alive, but was I?  And what made it so?  It seems I would have to place myself in extreme conditions on a consistent basis, making sure everything was exactly as I willed it, in order to be truly alive for an extended amount of time.  But that sounds truly impossible, and I have significant doubt as to that being the true meaning of Chamber's words. 

The real issue to face is the question of what holds my will back from being acted upon wholly.  Am I capable of such complete action?  And in that action will I find peace?  Or will I only find exhaustion and disappointment?  Am I willing to try?  Perhaps Integrity Pends upon our own initiative to seek True Life, and in our reaching out come to find it standing right behind us.